So you didn’t get into your dream school… Now what?

This sucks. You worked hard. You wrote your essays, rocked your SATs, took the most challenging classes you could, interviewed, toured, and sent in awesome recs. And yet... You still didn’t get into the school of your dreams.

You were banking on that school. How are you supposed to decide when you were meant to get into your dream?

So here’s a few things to do when your plans don’t work out the way you thought they would.

Take a long hard look at your other options

While touring schools people with dream schools often look around and think, “Well it’s good… but it’s not [dream school]. Well, now that dream school is off the table, you might start to see things in a new light… Maybe you overlooked some of the smaller details that made your other schools amazing, or you just refused to see the good in them.

Look at finances

Oftentimes people have the attitude of, “If I can magically get into this school I’ll make it work somehow.” If that school is out of the running, maybe it’s time to bump up finances from a minor inconvenience to a deciding factor. If you’re planning on going to graduate school, or into a career that doesn’t make a whole lot of money, you might be best off picking the school that is most affordable.

Don’t compare

I’ve given this advice before, but really, don’t compare yourself to others. You have no idea what really goes on behind closed doors of admissions. You can make yourself the strongest applicant you can be, but there is still a whole lot of luck involved. Don’t look at the student’s who may have gotten into your dream school as “taking your spot.” Maybe they were full pay when you needed financial aid, maybe they’re half Cherokee, maybe they’re a varsity athlete, or maybe their grandparents work at the school. You don’t know the situation, and comparing yourself is only going to make things harder.

Don’t start making convoluted plans

There was a girl I knew with who was an average student for my high school. Mostly regular classes with a few honors and APs thrown in, B student, decent but not great boards. She only was accepted to her safety school, one of NY’s mid-tier state schools. But she insisted it was okay because “Oh if I can keep a B average my freshman year I can transfer to Cornell.”

I’m sorry. What?

Don’t be that kid. Don’t be the girl who applies to Penn nursing thinking she can transfer to Wharton.

Don’t be the kid who takes a gap year so they can go to GS at Columbia.

Can you go to community college for a year with the intention of transferring to a 4-year school? Absolutely. This is a great plan to get some credits in and save some money.
Don’t do things as part of your “master plan” to end up at an Ivy League or Top Tier school.
Don’t be that kid.

Really.

Find silver linings

There’s a saying in college admissions: “Everyone ends up where they’re supposed to go.”

And it’s true.

Truly, everything happens for a reason, and you were meant to go to the school you ended up at. Maybe you were supposed to meet a special someone, maybe form a lifelong friendship, or maybe find a mentor for your future career.
If I hadn’t gone to the school I go to, I don’t think I would be going in the career direction I am thinking of now. I would have gone organizational psychology instead of developmental. I would have wanted to work in offices instead of schools. With adults instead of teenagers. The school I attend was my first choice, and I was lucky enough to get in, and I really feel that I was meant to go here.

And finally, hopefully this doesn’t need saying but…

Don’t be pretentious about your choices
Don’t think of a school as “below you” or your “safety school” if it’s truly your only choice. To be a bit controversial… if you only got into your safety school, you overestimated your abilities and over-applied.
And guess what? You’re there now. You’re no better than any of the other students who are now your classmates. Find the good in where you are. Find things you love. If you’re the big fish in a pond that is too small for you? Do well freshman year and try to transfer. Don’t want to do that? Become valedictorian and go to a top tier grad school.

College acceptances are what you make of them. So make the best, even if the situation isn’t ideal.